


Lavender Blue

by FalCatrecon



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M, gratuitous knowledge of herbs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-14
Updated: 2019-03-14
Packaged: 2019-11-18 03:33:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,486
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18112424
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FalCatrecon/pseuds/FalCatrecon
Summary: For the @gabriel-spn-bingo square ‘Walking In While Changing’For the @sabrielcc color prompt Lavender-----Gabriel sunk down next to the herb garden the Winchesters has thrown together. It was a scraggly mess of weeds and needed a lot of work to be any sort of functional. With saving the world every other week it was no surprise things like this were neglected. He could identify everything here, the mint being the most prominent. As a plant it was a terror, taking over the whole bed. Well, what worked for a bed. The Winchesters wouldn’t know gardening unless Audrey II was in the middle of it, and even then it would have to bite them first.He let his fingers dig around, pulling the actual weeds out from the useful ones. The mindless work was nice, and he could hang out and enjoy the sun for once. It wasn’t their fault that the bunker was, well, a bunker. After being trapped in a dungeon for so long there was no wonder he wasn’t a fan of underground places.





	Lavender Blue

Gabriel sunk down next to the herb garden the Winchesters has thrown together. It was a scraggly mess of weeds and needed a lot of work to be any sort of functional. With saving the world every other week it was no surprise things like this were neglected. He could identify everything here, the mint being the most prominent. As a plant it was a terror, taking over the whole bed. Well, what worked for a bed. The Winchesters wouldn’t know gardening unless Audrey II was in the middle of it, and even then it would have to bite them first.

He let his fingers dig around, pulling the actual weeds out from the useful ones. The mindless work was nice, and he could hang out and enjoy the sun for once. It wasn’t their fault that the bunker was, well, a bunker. After being trapped in a dungeon for so long there was no wonder he wasn’t a fan of underground places. He carefully unwrapped the creeping tendrils of the healthy mint from around some of the less healthy herbs. It looked like they had tried to grow wolfsbane and nightshade, but this breed wasn’t meant for the wild. At least he recognized it before touching it barehanded. It was dead, but he couldn’t remember how long the things stayed poisonous. Probably should go look into some spare gloves.

Instead he scooted around to a different part of the mess and began the weeding again. This section was infested with thyme with an under layer of chamomile. He just yanked out part of those plants as they grew far too thick to try and salvage the size and still have other herbs grow. This looked to be the more common herb section as he found some rosemary and lavender buried underneath. The rosemary was still trying, but the poor lavender was on its last legs. He always appreciated the smell and protective qualities of lavender, and hated to see it so wilted.

Gabriel wrapped his hands around the base and lightly expended some grace, smiling as it perked up a bit. He also quickly realized he shouldn’t do that again. Being low on grace wasn’t fun, and doing that was making it worse. He took the time to dig out more of the other plants, letting them breathe, taking note of what was dead or missing as he went along. If he was going to be useless in battle and healing he’d at least make this garden work. He stopped only when he heard the familiar growl of the Impala’s engine down the road.

Standing up he tried his best to dust off his hands. No dice, he was covered in dirt. At least the garden was looking heaps better. It was functional finally, though it could use a border and maybe a couple of trellises. He tried again at his hands, but knew it was fruitless. He had to just suck it up and head inside. Maybe a nice hot shower would be good.

As he walked the stair down into the bunker he suppressed a shiver. It was safe, it wasn’t a bad place, but he could feel the wards as he walked by. He could get over himself enough to live in the space for now, and hopefully he wouldn’t feel so bad once he was all up to snuff. He caught sight of one of the go-bags on the table, which meant the brothers had found their way inside. Goodie, he’d check with them after he wasn’t covered in dirt.

Gabriel pushed the door open to the shower room and found himself faced with the expanse of Sam’s rather naked back. Not that he was complaining. Sam however immediately snagged a towel after a startled noise of surprise. “G-Gabe!”

He grinned in reply and added a little wave. “Welcome back.” He let his eyes roam, and started to frown. Sam was sporting a dark bruise, spread nearly across his whole back. “Jeez, What the hell happened?”

Sam has the wherewithal to look embarrassed. “Uh, a lamia and a wall.”

Gabriel stepped forward. Now that he said that, he could see the crushing bruises circled down near his waist. He nearly touched Sam’s back before he remembered how useless it would be. “I…” He attempted a smirk and deflection. “Looks like you got a crush.”

Sam rolled his eyes and tried to stretch, his movements very slow. Maybe even some cracked ribs if the hitch in his movement was any indication. He really wished he could heal him, and it would be another week or so before Cas came back from his hunt. Sam paused in his slow movements. “Why are you covered in dirt?”

“Oh,” He looked down at himself with a sheepish smile, once again dusting at himself futilely. “Right. I was fixing your sad excuse for a garden.”

Sam’s brows wrinkled in confusion before finally clearing. “I forgot about that. It was the men of letters, I tried to fix it too.” He offered a sympathetic smile. “It’s a mess.”

Gabriel snorted in humor as he started to unbutton his shirt. “I noticed. There’s some still alive in there, but you have a few you need to add again.” He shrugged out of his shirt, noticing Sam’s eyes skidded off to a further point than him as he turned faintly pink. Well now, that was fun to know. “Some of the plants are biohazards, so I gotta find some spare gloves somewhere.”

The embarrassment left with a spike of worried curiosity in Sam’s eyes. “You okay?”

Gabriel stopped and just stared at Sam for a long moment, who looked away again under the scrutiny. “Me?” He shook his head slowly. “Nah, I’m fine. You just have some wolfs bane and that stuff’s deadly and the poison sticks to what it touches.” He jazzed his hands. “I like touching stuff and having it not die.” It was oddly surprising to be worried over, but, he had to admit, nice.

As Gabriel reached down to work on his pants, because he was still getting that shower regardless, Sam stood up quickly. He sharply hissed in pain at the sudden movement but tried to play it off. “Uh, I should get to the shower.” Sam wheezed out while bee-lining to a stall and shut the door.

Gabriel kept his laugh to himself and finished undressing. It was cute how weirdly embarrassed the taller man got. He honestly had no clue if it was general embarrassment of being naked around other people or Gabriel specifically. He wasn’t going to lie to himself, he kinda hoped it was just him. That bruising though… He was going to get himself killed. Gabriel had been on both ends of the Winchester spectrum of good and evil and he knew just how terrifyingly dangerous their job really was. 

He stood and listened to Sam’s shower running for a moment and watched the steam begin to rise. Hot water would certainly make the aching muscles feel better, but it wouldn’t stop the pain or reduce the swelling. He stepped into an open stall and started his own water. He remembered a willow tree outside which was good for pain. Not that they needed that since modern medicine was awesome. He thought over the other plants that had survived in the garden and most had been replaced for the medicinal uses by now. He wallowed in the water’s heat as he watched the dirt flow down the drain. He had an idea for other ways he could use them though.

\------

Gabriel was busy hanging some of the good plants out to dry in the ingredients room. This stuff he knew well enough, and could keep the plants outside alive. He still needed to see if he could get the boys to find the missing herbs and maybe some proper gardening tools. It was mostly mint and thyme he could harvest from for the moment, but he had found some sage and basil that had enough growth too.

Sam paused at the doorway as he was walking by and looked in curiously. “What’s this?”

Rolling his eyes, Gabriel tied the bundle he was working on off. “Herbs, duh. Speaking of,” He picked up a vase he had found, which was now full of water and lavender flowers, and offered it to Sam. “Put this in your room.”

Sam took the vase, looking as confused as ever. “...Should I ask why?”

“I’d worry if you didn’t.” Gabriel smiled up at him. “Lavender is a great ward for evil spirits and general protection, and if it’s near enough to your bed it should help you sleep better.” He shrugged a bit. “Also a great anti-bacterial, but I figure meds have you covered there.”

Sam looked down at what he held, a small smile sneaking it’s way on his face. He put the bundle up to his face to smell, and the smile widened. “Thanks.” He looked around again at what was drying. “So you know what these do?”

“Generally. I bet there’s stuff your books have that I don’t know.” He gestured towards the mint. “Like that’s great for indigestion and the smell helps make you alert.” He pointed at the sage. “And the smoke from that helps clear the air of bad feelings.” He waved his hand in a so-so motion. “Not as awesome for actual real dangerous spirits though.”

Sam nodded, still holding the vase fairly close to his chest. “I knew about sage, but not the mint.” He reached out with his free hand to touch one of the mint bundles. “I know it tastes good.”

Gabriel laughed. “Yeah, it does that too.” He reached out and plucked a fresh leaf, tucking it up next to his gums where the flavor would suffuse his mouth for awhile. “Fresh is best for flavor, but dried is a good garnish.” He gestured to the table where he had a mortar and pestle set up and bundles of mint and lavender waiting. “And the oil is best for flavoring food and, you know, anointing things or whatever.”

“Man Gabe, you know your stuff.” Sam grinned down at him. He also ildly took another sniff of the flowers in his hand. 

Gabriel couldn’t help the soft smile at that, plus the compliment. “Thanks.” Sam was cute when he wasn’t trying to kill something. He was also happy netting a real smile for once. Not worry, not anger, not politeness, but a legit smile.

Sam looked down at the vase in hand. “I’m going to go put this away, then I probably should get back to the research I was going to do.” He gave a small wave, the smile still on his face as he headed out of the room.

Gabriel gave a small sigh of relief. Looked like Sam didn’t recognize the flowers were a bit too big and the leaves a little too blue. The last thing he needed was a lecture on expending his grace. He hadn’t really thought it would make the lavender grow quite like _that_ though.

Dang, Sam was too distracting. He forgot to ask about the gardening stuff.

\-----

Gabriel finally managed to wrangle a trip to the local hardware plant section and found some of the stuff for sale. Of course there were rarer plants that they might want he’d have to grow from seed online, but that wouldn’t be too difficult to do. Not too long ago he’d have to do a bunch of footwork to even begin to find the seeds, but yay for the internet where you could get practically anything.

He’d gotten a bit of argument from Dean at first, but Sam backed him up on the usefulness of the fresh herbs and how it would make them more self-sufficient. So Dean relented and Gabriel could continue his work outside. Sam helped him carry the bags of good dirt up to the garden while Gabriel managed the plants themselves. He was going to make this a useful garden while making himself useful too.

When they did finally haul everything up, Sam stuck around for a bit to watch. It made Gabriel a bit self-conscious, but he went and dug around in the dirt anyway. He started by carefully removing the dead poisonous ones with a pair of disposable gloves, putting the plants and the gloves in a garbage bag and immediately tying it off. He pointed at it. “Don’t touch that.”

Sam nodded and left it alone. He seemed more interested in watching Gabriel work anyway, which made him feel awkward. It wasn’t like he was doing anything weird, but, well maybe it was how powerless he had to do everything. He couldn’t just snap it pretty anymore. While Sam might not find it pathetic, he kind of did. Just another creature digging around in the dirt, trying to be useful to something.

Gabriel stopped digging and took a deep breath. He was starting to be haphazard which could hurt the plants he was trying to uproot and replant in the new soil he had just made the Winchesters buy. If there weren’t plants he would have wasted their fake money and real time.

A motion out of the corner of his eye made him jump slightly. Sam had been so still Gabriel had forgotten to keep track. He had gotten up to look at the plants, lightly caressing their leaves. Gabriel couldn’t help the grin up at him at the touches. Sam smiled back and touched the lavender. “Thanks for the lavender by the way, I think I did sleep better.”

His grin softened. “Always welcome.” He pointed towards a tiny white and yellow flower. “When the chamomile gets bigger we can brew a tea. It’s great for sleep too.”

Sam shook his head. “Nah, I think I’ll stick to this.” For some reason that gave Gabriel a swell of pride and happiness. It was his grace that had improved it after all, and Sam, even if he didn’t know, essentially picked _him_ over some normal plant. Gabriel grabbed the feeling and stuffed it down. It was irrational and while the Winchesters were perennially finding themselves new family members he doubted he’d be one of them. Much less in the way he had started to want to be. He focused instead on carefully removing the root ball from the dirt where he was working, setting the basil aside and then beginning on the next.

Gabriel could feel Sam’s eyes on him now that he was so close. He refused to look up, instead gesturing to the spare spade nearby. “If you’re going to stare you might as well help.” He winced at himself for his defensive rudeness. Whatever, it’s what they expected out of him anyway.

“Oh, uh, sure.” Sam actually sat himself down next to him with the spade. “What can I do?” Gabriel just stared up at him for a moment, surprised. He was sure he’d have gone off to do research or something. Not stick around and play in dirt.

“Uh.” He shook his head to clear it before gesturing to what he was doing. “We need to carefully get the plants in the bed up so we can mix in the good dirt.”

It was a good couple of hours before Dean found them just finishing tilling the plots with the new soil and about to plant the old and new plants back in. “Dude, I’ve been looking all over for you. We got a case.”

Sam wiped his forehead and looked over at Gabriel sheepishly. “Uh…”

Gabriel shrugged in return. “I can finish. Thanks for helping.”

He didn’t just drop the spade like Gabriel thought he would. He stood and hemmed a moment, like he was actually maybe going to tell his brother no. Which of course didn’t. He did turn to Gabriel and smile brightly though. “Glad I could help! It’s nice to be outside sometimes.”

Gabriel watched the brothers leave, hearing the beginnings of Dean’s ragging on Sam. “I don’t see how you can work in all that dirt…” Shaking his head he began the replanting. He hoped they’d stay safe this time. Especially Sam. He grimaced at the dirt he was digging in. This crush was going to be his undoing, wasn’t it?

\-----

They were relatively safe this time, though Gabriel got to listen at how close they cut it. No fun bruises or cuts at least, but a near miss with a chainsaw was never a good thing. Stupid tulpas and their stupid being believed in. Dangerous suckers if you didn’t know what they were. Less dangerous if you could just snap them away. If only.

In the meantime he had finished the planting, and had gone ahead and cut back some of the bushier ones. He had specifically picked the biggest at the store for this very reason, and now was working through drying some and turning others to their oil. At least that’s what he was ostensibly doing when any of them walked by. When no one was around he was kind of making something for Sam. As protection only, of course. Because that’s what people do for other people and no just people they had a crush on. Yup.

He sighed, staring down at the sachet in front him. Light purple with his symbol picked out in gold, so he was so not obvious about this. Ugh. He plucked a leaf off the one plant he hadn’t put in the garden but in a pot for the room. Tucking the leaf in his mouth to suck on, he reveled in the chocolate mint flavor. This being nearly human business really put a damper on his candy bar eating, as his body wanted things like nutrients and vitamins instead. Leaves were like vegetables, right?

“What’s that?” Gabriel started at Sam’s voice behind him. He hadn’t been paying attention at all. How had he gotten so close? And now even closer and reaching over his shoulder.

“Uh.” He brain restarted and he realized Sam was pointing at the sachet. He picked it up and offered it wordlessly to Sam. Who was still really close for some reason he couldn’t fathom.

Sam took it, but was looking worriedly at Gabriel. “You okay?”

Gabriel nodded. “Peachy.” He took a slow breath when Sam’s worry didn’t really lessen, and offered his best smile. “I’m fine. That’s for you by the way.”

The smile seemed to mollify Sam as he inspected his gift. “It smells awesome. Travel lavender?”

“I guess you could use it for that.” Gabriel’s smile became a bit more genuine. “There’s an arrowhead covered in lavender oil, which is supposed to protect you from abuse.” He reached out and patted roughly where his coat pocket would sit. “Carry it on you.”

“Really?” He rolled the sachet in his hand, his thumb stroking the stitching. “This looks… familiar.” His brow wrinkled in thought, which certainly thrilled inner Gabriel. He had never bothered showing the Winchester’s his name, which meant Sam had to have looked it up. Which of course he did, Gabriel had been kind of an asshat before. Know thine enemy and all that. Sam looked up at him after the silence stretched longer than needed. “So? What is it?”

“Me.” Gabriel half shrugged. “I mean, it’s not exactly a great protection when I’m so low on angel juice.” But he tried. It’s the thought that counts, right? He really, desperately wanted to be there to protect him. None of that out loud though. He kinda wanted to stay around.

The soft smile from Sam almost had him spouting the nonsense anyway. “Thanks. I like it.” His thumb continued to trail along the stitching, the movement of which was fascinating to Gabriel. It didn’t look conscious, which he wasn’t sure if that was good or not. Like, did he pet _his_ name mindlessly, or just liked to touch stuff mindlessly? Not that touching stuff mindlessly wasn’t a distracting thought in it’s own right. He tore his eyes away and tried to busy himself with the mortar nearby. What the hell was happening to him, honestly. 

Sam tucked the packet into his jeans pocket and began asking little questions about how Gabriel processed everything. He found the conversation easy, and couldn’t help but notice when Sam’s hand seemed to stray to his pocket every once in awhile. He tried to squash the tiny bit of hope that flared, refusing to admit anything until it was a bit more blatant than that. He was just happy to be useful around here and have a place to be. It wasn’t like he couldn’t function in the outside world without his grace, but it was absurdly hard to. He was fine just hanging out and being helpful. Really, he was fine. Just peachy.

\----

One morning he found himself staring at a new addition to his garden space. A table and two chairs. Huh. They were cheaper but still metal, and probably folded up so they could fit in the Impala. He set his work bag on the table and sorted through for his gloves and scissors. A couple of other plants had gotten big so he needed to harvest, or at least prune.

He was elbow-deep in the thyme when he heard someone crunching up the path. He looked up to Sam sitting down in the chair with his laptop. He grinned and waved, finishing his work on the plant before walking over. He paused a moment to snag a sprig of lavender before reaching Sam. “Your WiFi work out here?”

Sam smiled back, opening the top. “Somehow.”

Gabriel sunk into the chair opposite him. “You come here often?” He presented the flowers, adding a wink. Yeah, he was gonna flirt. It was something he was known for and totally could be not serious. Except he kinda felt maybe it was. A bit.

Sam laughed and accepted the lavender, for some reason tucking it behind his ear. It was mind meltingly adorable. “Yeah, pretty often to watch you work.” 

Gabriel rolled his eyes outwardly, when inwardly he was just about dead. “Sure you are. Not because outside is nice and the garden smells wonderful.”

Sam smiled ruefully a bit in response. “Sure.” He perked up again and shoved a can forward that Gabriel hadn’t noticed. “For you.”

Gabriel picked it up with a grin. A nice cold sweet soda for a hot day of work. “Thanks!” He took a good long pull on it, relishing the sugar that he didn’t get nearly as often as he wanted.

Sam stared at his computer for a moment, though didn’t really click on anything. In the middle of another sip Gabriel was taking, he spoke up. “Why’ve you been giving only me things?”

Gabriel sputtered against the drink, going into a coughing fit. He hadn’t even been thinking about that. Sam reached over to make sure he was okay, but he just waved him off to finish getting the soda out of his lungs. He had been favoring Sam in the gift department. He was glad Sam had noticed, but his asinine mouth had to open when he got his breath back. “What, ol’ Dean’s getting jealous?”

“No, I just thought…” Sam shook his head, still looking at him in concern. “Nevermind. You okay?”

“Fine. Peachy.” He felt like such a little shit. An asshole of the highest order. He stood up. “Well, those weeds won’t weed themselves.” He still offered a small smile before heading back to the garden. “Thanks for the soda.”

“You’re welcome.” He could see Sam still looked a little confused, but he wasn’t going to address that. He instead threw himself into the garden, vigorously pulling weeds and pruning the biggest plants. Glancing up occasionally he could see Sam still looking his way sometimes, actually watching him work. And still wearing the lavender in his hair. He carefully bundled the herbs together, setting them near the table.

“Hey, Gabe,” Sam watched him carefully. “Are you honestly okay?”

Gabriel sighed and leaned against the other chair. “Honest? I’m tired of being useless.” He raised a hand when he saw Sam start to protest. “No, I know. But I’m not an archangel right now.” He gestured grandly to the world at large. “I could do so much more for you than just make a garden nice.”

Sam smiled and shook his head. “You’ve done a whole lot around here. It’s not just the garden but your knowledge you’ve added.” He dug around in his pocket and placed the sachet on the table. Gabriel stared at it, knowing Sam didn’t need to carry it around while at the bunker. “You’ve turned our ingredients room into a functional workspace and made me this.” His smile brightened somehow. “And you’ve been a great friend.”

Huffing a laugh, Gabriel sunk into the chair. “Yeah, but…” He shook his head, trying to find the right words. The thing was, he knew Sam understood the feeling. Hell, he had caused the useless frustration feeling way back on a particular Tuesday. And his logical side knew and understood what Sam was saying. His heart was long since lost to the compliments Sam was dishing out. It was just still that dark corner of his mind, the same one that had sent him hiding in the first place, that kept reminding him how powerful he once was and how useless he was now.

Sam leaned forward and rested a hand on his arm, and wasn’t that a great feeling. “You’re a good person.” Sam winced slightly. “Being. Celestial wavelength?”

That had Gabriel properly laughing, patting Sam’s hand in return. “I see you’ve been talking to my brother. Person is fine.” He may have let his hand linger on Sam’s a little longer than necessary. “And I’m as good as I’m going to be.”

Worry still creased Sam’s face, but he nodded and squeezed his arm before pulling back. “If you say so.” It was a wonder at how much capacity Sam had for caring. It was in his full right to have never helped him in the first place with the sheer amount of shit he had put both brothers through. Hell, Sam had more of a right to be upset since he actually remembered all those Tuesdays. Plus he had kind of focused his teasing more on Sam in TV Land too...Okay, maybe he had a tiny crush a whole lot longer than he initially thought. So sue him, the guy was hot.

Gabriel stood up and stretched. He could see out of the corner of his eye Sam watching with interest. Or so he thought. Yay brain and crushes making things seem more than they might be. Leaning down he gathered up the bundled herbs and tilted his head back towards the bunker. “My work is done if you want to come inside too.”

Sam clicked the laptop shut with a smile. “Well if my entertainment is leaving, I guess I will too.”

\------

They were off on another hunt and Gabriel was tackling the garden harder than before. Not that it needed it, but he was frustrated with himself. He had tried to go through a hunters routine a moment ago without them here and he had failed. He couldn’t aim for shit without angel assistance, and even his knife work could use improvement. He was at least glad he did it with the Winchesters out, because he wasn’t sure whether Dean’s teasing or Sam’s gentle pity would be worse. What was most frustrating was that if he wanted to go out in the field with them he’d have to ask for training, like some sort of newbie who needed their hand held. They already had enough on their plate for him to burden them even more with himself.

Not that Sam wouldn’t willingly try to train him. He was so selfless it was maddening. He treated him so nicely it wasn’t helping him stuff that crush in the corner it needed to be in. He would give it more thought if he didn’t know Sam was just as nice to everyone else. The giant puppy he was.

He threw the spade in his hand across the garden in frustration, hearing it clang harshly against the table. At least he could hit the broad side of a barn. He stood up, brushing the dirt off his knees.

Sam appeared hurrying up the hill, looking worried. “You okay?”

Man, he hadn’t even heard the engine arrive he had been so pissed at himself. Now look what he did, he upset Sam. He huffed a sigh in frustration. “I’m fine.” It came out sharper, pretty much saying ‘not fine’, and he knew it.

Sam, being Sam, of course didn’t back off. “No you’re not.” He crossed his arms, looking pointedly at the spade on the ground then back up. Gabriel realized the only way he could have heard that was if he was headed this way in the first place. He was coming to see him first after coming home. That. That wasn’t fair to his emotions at all.

“No. No I’m not.” Gabriel crossed his arms too, squaring off against Sam. “This is all I can do! I can’t shoot, I can’t fight, I suck at research no matter what I actually know.” He gestured sharply back at the garden. “I was one of the strongest beings ever to exist and now I’m a damn gardener!”

Sam took two strides over to him and planted his hands on Gabriel’s shoulders. “Stop it.” He lightly shook him. “You’re important.”

Gabriel glared back up at him. “For what? As a back pocket investment?” He could feel the anger rolling under his skin. “I’m just a burnt out failure of a trickster archangel! Just another misfit to your collection!” He shoved at Sam roughly, trying to get past him. He could feel tears starting and that was the last bit of weakness he refused to show.

Sam didn’t budge. “You are not a failure.” Gabriel’s eyes snapped up as he heard the soft edge to Sam’s words. “You…” He shook his head, looking for words. Of course it was hard to find words for anything positive. 

Gabriel deflated where he stood, giving up. “I don’t need your pity. Sorry about…” He gestured vaguely. “Whatever I just did.”

“Gabriel…” Sam loosened his handhold, his face what Gabriel imagined was a mess of pity. He was about to leave, having been released, when Sam’s arms wrapped around him. His mind hiccuped against it, the dumbass crush suddenly overwhelming the self pity. His emotions sucked so hard. “You’re important to _me_.”

Oh. Oh no. There went what little self control he had left. He wrapped his own arms around Sam, holding tight and trying his best not to just cry into his shirt. Father, he was such a mess. “You don’t mean that.”

Sam’s arms tightened around him. “Yes I do. I mean that very much.” Gabriel felt a light kiss to his hair. 

He shook his head roughly in reply, though still held on tight. “I don’t deserve you.” He really couldn’t help the faint sniffle, and hated himself for it. This wasn’t at all how he imagined finding out, or better yet him telling Sam. He was supposed to be tough and suave and funny, not an emotional wreck.

He felt his hair ruffle with a faint laugh from Sam. “I’m just some human who fell for an angel. If anything, I don’t deserve you.”

Gabriel let out his own wet laugh in return. “Angels fall, dummy. Plus you’re not _just_ a human. You’re Sam friggin Winchester. The best human.”

Sam pulled back with a soft smile, trying to meet his eyes. “Sure. If you’re the best angel.”

“You’re such a sap.” Gabriel fake shoved, though making sure he still stayed next to him. “I don’t know why I have such a crush on you.”

Sam’s smile spread and brightened. “Really? So it was you and not the lamia?”

“Hey now, there’s only one here who can make bad jokes and that’s me.” Gabriel grinned back, his hands resting on Sam’s hips. Now that he had him he didn’t want to let go. Sam seemed to be of a similar mindset as his own hands didn’t leave Gabriel’s hips either. Gabriel’s mock narrowed his eyes. “You sure you want me, kiddo?” He was trying to play it humorous but the back of his brain was slowly freaking out again.

Sam rolled his eyes and pulled him forward, kissing him softly. If there was such thing as a right answer to that question, Gabriel was pretty sure this was it. He kissed back, a hand weaving itself into Sam’s hair. This. This was exactly what he wanted.


End file.
